Wednesday, January 11, 2006

You Changed, Man

Another week, another Gauntlet 2 episode, another letdown. Last week, I figured there would be more blood shed with the Mark/Robin/Jodi situation. Instead, it was bread. Drama to start, competition and Gauntlet in the middle, drama at the end. This week? Same thing...I start wondering who would win a Gauntlet between Derrick and Brad. They fight for reasons not explained. Then we see body paint, Syrus's glistening flesh (976-WHOLE-LOTTA, y'all), and Alton dismantle Adam in the Gauntlet. Then...right back to Brad acting like a jackass, and Derrick matching him. It's fun, but it's not that exciting.

I'm not bored by this season. Really, I'm not. I'm not feeling the pain that I did with Inferno and Battle of the Sexes 2, as reflected in my recaps. It's just that with the captains in place, I can't see too much supense going down, at least not right now. I'm trying to be fair...in the five Gauntlets so far, there has only been one where there was suspense on who would win: Adam L./Derrick. Compare that to the first five endgames in The Gauntlet. We had David/Sarah...thought that would be a blowout in Bishop Woo Woo's favor, but his big muscles killed him in Deadman's Drop. Katie/Montana was blah, and Steve's win over Tonya was preordained (he was a puzzle master, she had crappy luck). Skipping past Katie/Rachel B., you had Coral vs. Tina. Remember that? Real World team turned on Coral, and she broke down after Mike stabbed her in the back. Hey, I know she sucked at that time, but "Coral Betrayed" made for a better story (also: "Great Coral Grief," which was my recap title). She ended up staring down Tina, taking "Discount Coral" out of Telluride. All I'm saying is that the best is yet to come. Worst case, we get a middle-of-the-road season...and with Fresh Meat Challenge coming up, that's not a bad thing.

Let's take a look at the captains and their chances for staying to the end.

Alton

He's got one more sacrifice with Jeremy, who should have been buried in the Gauntlet. After that, Alton would have to face Jamie (two-time Challenge winner), Randy (was with Jamie and Alton on the platform at the end of Royal Rumble), Landon (still a tiny bit psycho, won a Challenge), and MJ (former college football player, takes competition way too seriously). I don't know if there's a stronger captain that Alton. He might slip a few times in Get That Coconut, but that might be his sole weakness.

Kina

If you're Cara or Susie? Start worrying. With Jo and Cameran won, four of the six Rookie ladies left are from Road Rules: X-Treme. While I don't know if there's any animosity between the girls, I'm pretty sure that Kinda would protect all of them. I can't get a proper read on the survival instincts of these women...but I'm sure Susie is the next to go. First of all, there's the crying bit we saw in the commercials. Second, you'd figure Syrus might be telling stories from Extreme Challenge. "Tough Guy mission? Susie had to be carried. Find out all the details at 976-HELLA-USELESS."

Derrick

Think of him as the male version of Katie. The more pissed off he is, the better his chances of winning. He'd be the favorite against Ace (bad endgame luck), David (couldn't really get started during Inferno) and Syrus (knee issues, weight problems). Then you have Mark and Timmy...the old guard of Road Rules, guys who might see Derrick as one of the reasons why the show went off the air. Okay, probably not. Gotta make up a compelling story. And if Brad comes at Derrick in the Gauntlet? Awesome. I mean, I do like both of these meatheads, and I'd want them both to stay on the show...but their battle would be must-see television.

Ruthie

The fear still remains...what if Beth beats Ruthie? It's just this lingering concern...Beth is the weakest of all of the women from the start. She gives nothing to the team except drama. Meanwhile, Ruthie could take out half of the guys by her lonesome. But I'm scared that the Veterans will vote Beth in, and she'd win, forcing Ruthie to put a paper bag over her head for the rest of her life. If Ruthie does dust the bitch, Montana would be next on the chopping block, followed by Katie. The remaining girls (Aneesa, Julie, Robin) have shown signs of insanity in the past, but none of them will go in unless they hurt the team directly. With a format like this, you need your crazy chicks. I don't like the idea of Julie completing a Challenge, but everybody else has been acting more psycho than her.

I hope you guys will keep watching, and I hope you tellyour friends about my recaps. What else can you watch? The Bachelor? ABC threw The Mole under the bus for that?!? Please...I'll be tuning in to MTV every Monday night, thank you very much.

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