I don't have a life. I think I told you guys that when I began. It's just that there's little going on to warrant sharing with an audience, even if that crowd is less than a dozen. Of course, I don't want everybody to think I'm all about reality shows and my recaps. It's just...nothing's going on.
March Madness? I'm not into that. I might be the only red-blooded American male not to be in a pool right now. Part of it is that I don't watch basketball games. If you take away the times I saw the Harlem Globetrotters as a kid, I've been to maybe six games total. Also, I didn't go to a big university, where life is nothing but a period between Midnight Madness and "One Shining Moment." I went to Wagner College, a small liberal arts school in Staten Island. In basketball, they're located in the Northeast Conference. I don't believe that anybody from the NEC has won a tournament game. They usually go in as a 15th or 16th seed, and get wasted by a national power. Tonight, Farleigh Dickinson got to within one of Illinois at halftime...then things went downhill from there.
Actually, I did get interested two years ago. Wagner had become successful at the time, and they hosted the NEC tournament. All I remember was that the coach was Dereck Whittenberg. Ten years prior, he was the guy who launched a desperation shot for North Carolina State against Houston in the championship game. Lorenzo Charles ended up slam-dunking the ball, giving the Wolfpack the shocking win. Yeah, now you remember. Anyway, Wagner won the conference title. I was there...only the second time I ever saw a season-clinching victory. It was the first time they went to the Big Dance, and they were a 15th seed against Pittsburgh. They played close for, like, ten minutes. Then the Panthers just pulled out, and the NEC was still 0-for-forever in the tournament.
What else do I not go for? St. Patrick's Day. Just another day...like Valentine's Day, only less depressing to think about. Going to the forums, I just got bummed. Tom Westman, the fireman from Queens and current fan favorite of Survivor: Palau (running neck and neck with Ian the dolphin trainer) was in the big parade. Would I have gone if the possiblity had occured to me? Who knows. I'm just hoping he's a fan of The Amazing Race and somebody invites him to TARCon. At the very least, I gotta ask why he voted the square root of Willard last night. Seriously, they showed the votes, and Tom put Willard's name under a square root sign. Weird.
I'm just not feeling motivated to write lately. It's not that I don't have ideas. I gotta explain my fondness for kiddie anime, especially Yu-Gi-Oh! down the line. I'm flirting with driving to Uniondale in April and watching arena football for this blog. And as a regular poster at Television Without Pity, I need to write about a recent post on another site from Danny Kastner of The Apprentice. Wait, I can do that now. First of all: shut up, Danny. Secondly, you're the guy who's supposed to be the fun, spontaneous, "UNBELIEVABLE!!!!" team member. So why is your skin that thin? Third, you were probably only cast to be the dancing monkey, the one that gets taken out when things get old. And your audition tape? Ye Gods. Further down, Kristen stops in and adds to the fire. Kristen is the last judge on anything, ever. Yeah, like I'm SO jealous of dips like Erin, Bren and John for being on the show.
Thinking about it...there should be something along the lines of the Miranda Rights for reality television. Before somebody is put on a show, a producer (whomever is available) would read the rights to that person, giving him/her one last chance to bail out. So far, I have "Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of public opinion" and "You have the right to blame editing, but nobody will believe you." I won't lie...the thought of being on The Amazing Race or a resurrected version of The Mole is very sweet to me. But I know that I will probably be squeezed into whatever form the editors put me in, and that people who don't know me and my online presence might smack me around. But I would be ready, and I wouldn't try to pick fights.
That's it. If you have any additions for my "Reality Rights" idea, comment on them or e-mail me back. It'll be a nice little project between watching Tonya go nuts every Monday night.
PS: While I'm thinking about it...could somebody help me out with linking stuff? I'd like to put up links on the side, and maybe set up pages where I can link to past recaps.