Sunday, May 15, 2005

Reunion Predictions

Six more hours until the Survivor: Palau finale. Eight until we find out who gets the million bucks. While I'm too big of a wuss to predict a winner, I can guess what will go down at the reunion.

  • Most likely to get exactly ten seconds of attention from Probst: Ashlee and Willard.
  • Wanda will sing. Oh, God, will she sing. And we'll be reaching for whatever alcohol we didn't consume during the finale. Also, Jonathan will get as much time as Wanda, since they only went two days in Palau.
  • If Probst gets bored, he'll circle back and ride Janu about quitting, even though he basically talked her into it. By the way, I hate how some folks dumped on her. Not like she was a total wussy like Osten.
  • James will often a half-sincere apology to Ibrehem over the whole "Your God ain't gonna help ya now" interview. But he'll still look like a rat, figuratively and literally.
  • "Ibrehem" will be misspelled the first few times we see the name.
  • Jeff & Kim and Gregg & Jenn will get grief over their relationships, but not that much...unless Jenn wins. Then Probst will try and pull for a Ramber redux, asking Gregg if he has a ring to give. "C'mon, she's got a million bucks now! Make your move, dude!"
  • Angie will wear something "punk rock" enough for us to compare her to Frankie Abernathy from The Real World: San Diego.
  • Coby will try to kill himself and others as he lunges in front of the cameras.
  • Survivors not in the final four that will get the most applause: Stephanie and Bobby Jon.
  • Biggest party: the fire station where Tom works. Time permitting, they'll show him with Ian and Gregg at the St. Patrick's Day parade.

What the hell...I'm going with Tom to win. An alpha male and fan fave winning will be the biggest shock of all. Now that I've said that, he'll get purple rocked to death, Katie will win, and that'll be the worst finish since Jenna Morasca won The Amazon.

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